September is the introduction to fall and the last quarter of the year.  To me it’s the beginning of another of my favorite seasons and a time of reflection about people loved and crossed over.  It’s a time when I think of my brother, whose birthday fell on October 20 and who passed away November 21, 1993.  When I think of the immense sense of shock at the thought of losing him and the grief and loss I felt during the last months of his illness and death I still shed tears.  My children were all very young then, now all grown and pursuing their own interests and lives. Eighteen years have not diminished the sorrow when I think of the fun we could have shared with their antics in the years of their childhood and teenage years.  When my oldest son calls I am occasionally caught off guard and surprised at how much his voice reminds me of talking to Tom on the phone.

Facing the loss of someone you love is never easy.  Remembering all the wonderful things about them, while bringing a tear to our eye, still brings the joyous memories of all the times well spent ~ if we choose to focus on those things.  I still hear my brother’s voice and recall our sense of humor together, the laughing fits we could create, the music we loved to play on piano and guitar together, the records we loved and our sense of closeness.  I still sense him and see him, although he no longer exists in this world I still feel his presence and in my heart I focus on the good that comes in all situations.  I find peace in all things, even a loss so great.